Spring Cleaning

Me, this weekend:

jokes on you: i didn't clean it last year, either. 

Did I see Beauty and the Beast this week? MAYBE.

Yep. Had some houseguests visit this weekend, so I had to actually ~clean~ my apartment this weekend, beyond my usually monthly half-assed vacuuming and pushing dust around with a wet tissue. Oh, the humanity!

27,000 Dresses

What's new with me, you ask? This:

Ok, my actual dress is slightly less mermaid like and does not come with a tiny hat (their mistake, imho.)  I AM going to be in a wedding this summer, though! This is my first bridesmaid gig so...I'm sure I'll fuck it up, somehow. Anyone have any wedding horror stories? Share!

Butter Coffee

Have you guys heard of bulletproof coffee (or butter coffee)? Boyfriend has recently started using it.

Apparently blending is key to making it look like a real coffee and not black gunk with oil sitting on it. 

Don't stand between me and my breakfast. 

Boyfriend swears it's delicious, but I'm skeptical. Have you guys tried it? Or would you?

Trivets: The Conclusion

So, in case you missed it, I bought trivet kits for me and Boyfriend for Christmas. A couple of weeks ago, we finally finished them.  Ta-DA! 

Boyfriend’s:

Mine:

YEAH! 

Miss Priscilla Puffington got a sniff of em.

Miss Priscilla: What. Is. This.

Me: It’s a trivet, Miss Priscilla!

Miss Priscilla: Hmmm.

Me: What’s that mean?

Miss Priscilla: I could have done this better.

Me: Not without thumbs, bitch.

Miss Priscilla: What was that?

Me: Nothing, kitty!

Miss Priscilla: Gia.

Me: Yes?

Miss Priscilla: There are a LOT of wine corks here.

Me: Oh, hush.

Miss Priscilla: I mean, a lot a lot.

Me: I don’t think so.

Miss Priscilla: How much do you drink?

Me: They were amassed over quite awhile.

Miss Priscilla: …

Me: They were!

Miss Priscilla: What’s in this can?

Miss Priscilla: OMG THESE ARE ALL THE LEFTOVER ONES?!

Me: Yes…for our next cork project….

Miss Priscilla: Gia!

Me: What?

Miss Priscilla: YOU NEED HELP!

Me: There’s not that many there. And some are Boyfriends.

Miss Priscilla: I judge you based on the amount of corks you have.

Me: Fine. I’m going to start getting screw top bottles.

Exercise Ideas, Mayor-Gia Style

I noticed a lot of people are blogging about dieting/exercising lately and I thought, hey, I wanna get in on that.

I already created the Mayor Gia Diet , remember?

In practice:

Now, time for a Mayor Gia exercise!

You can use a regular size bottle of wine, or if you’re really feeling ambitious, a Mayor Gia sized bottle.

Anyway, start by sitting.

Then pic up the bottle of wine.

But don’t pour any.

Lift it up

And down

Repeat 20 times per arm.

The burn means it’s working!

Once you’re finished, reward yourself with a glass of wine.

And watch those arms get super buff! You’re welcome, everyone.

Trivet making is also hard

In another edition of things that are hard, Boyfriend and I opened our trivet kits last weekend.

The boxes make it look super easy:

So we poured out all the corks and got ready:

First, I tried to remake what was on the box. Kind of easy, but you can see all the spaces where it doesn’t quite fit right:

  

Boyfriend made this one:

  

But then we started to do some of the other patterns they suggest, and it got hard.

I tried to be fancy.

Boyfriend had more patience than I did. Check out this action shot:

His giant man hands, not mine.

We also noticed a pattern with the corks.

There WERE a lot of sutter homes, see:

Ignore the columbia crest that sneaked into the corner. The rest are all sutter home.

Anyway, I got frustrated and since we didn’t have a glue gun we decided to stop for the night. I was ready to open my new bottle of sutter home pinot grigio (nope, not kidding).

We left the trivets like this:

His:

Mine:

Whose is better? You be the judge.