Monday, June 29, 2015

Cat Swap!

Boyfriend recently said this to me:

I'm sure that's what he meant.

So today I present:

Meet Gia, a twentysomething blogger with Kitty.

Who isn't, amirite??
And here's RandomGirl with her cat, SweetPea.

Watch Gia and RandomGirl switch pets for a week!

At Gia's apartment, things seem to be going well.

But at Random Girl's house, things are a different story.

A week later, they return to trade cats.

Sadly, Gia and RandomGirl swapped cats back. 

And Gia never got a full night of sleep again. The end!

Sunday, June 21, 2015

Another Grumble Shower

Technically it's Boyfriend's good blog idea. Oh well.

Shower games. NO. I should be more back to normalish next week.

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Throwback Thursday: How to Open a Bottle of Wine

Throwback Thursday: Because wine is right. Always.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

As some of you may recall, Boyfriend and I are collecting wine corks.

We’ve made decent progress. We’re doing everything we can.

So I thought I’d give you some dos and don’ts for how to open a bottom of wine.

DO: Unscrew the top*
*For screw-top wines

DO use a wine opener
Preserve the cork. DON’T break it into pieces.

DON’T break the wine opener

If you broke the wine opener, then DON’T use a screwdriver and hammer

And definitely DON’T use your teeth.

Also DON’T try to break it open.
The wine will fall into the bowl, we'll strain the pieces of glass out and voila! Genius, no?
In conclusion, DO have an extra wine opener handy.

And now you know the right way to open a bottle of wine! What’s the weirdest way you’ve opened one?

Monday, June 15, 2015

Grumble Shower Grumble

Oh hey guys. 

Stupid pregnant people. Is anyone else suffering from wedding/baby season?

Monday, June 8, 2015

Alarm Cat, the Saga Continues

As you guys may remember, Kitty is an asshole about getting breakfast. 

I recently purchased one of those timed feeders for when I need to be away for just a day or so. I figured I could also test it out for the weekend and maybe sleep in for awhile. I set it up for some time before 6 am. 

 But then a furry creature tried to climb on my face at 5 am.

Ok, no surprise. Kitty was confused about the breakfast. I shooed her  away and I blissfully went back to sleep.

 But then the monster returned.

So I hopped out of bed and went into the kitchen, and lo and behold the cat dish was open and licked clean.

Apparently, kitty will not be thwarted that easily. 

Sigh. You win this round, cat. 

Thursday, June 4, 2015

Throwback Thursday: Dear Egg Foo Young

Throwback Thursday: I still miss you, egg foo young. You greasy bastard.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Dear Egg Foo Young,

I miss you, you evil delicious addictive bastard. I used to eat you every time Boyfriend and I got chinese. And every time, without fail, I’d feel completely sick after:

Yet, you were so tasty, I’d let the cycle of abuse to continue and order you again next time. Even after that time you gave me food poisoning.

You had to be greasy, didn’t you? You knew I can’t eat greasy foods without feeling miserable after.

Boyfriend finally helped me see the light.
He pointed out that it was made in approximately 67 cups of oil.
And then I had an epiphany.

And just like that, I was free from your evil nausea inducing grasp. Boyfriend and I got Chinese over the weekend. And what did I order?
For some reason I was intense about it.
Sure, I miss you an itty bit. Sure, I was thinking of the egg foo young whilst eating the tofu.

But, I didn’t want to vomit all over Boyfriend immediately after eating tofu. So, it’s tofu that I’ll be sticking with.

GOODBYE, EGG FOO YOUNG! Your wretched grease-filled deliciousness will no longer have any power over me!

Mayor Gia

PS. But seriously, if I ever cure the probable h pylori that makes me feel so sick when I eat you, let’s talk.