Friday, November 30, 2012

Holiday Shopping

So, I’ve been asked a few times if I went shopping on black Friday.

I hate malls. I hate parking lots. I hate lines.  I signed up for amazon prime this year. So I get free two day shipping on tons of stuff. BEST. THING. EVER.

It’s fantastic. I’ve done nearly all of my Christmas shopping already. (It helps that I only shop for four people.) It makes me jolly.

Seriously, how am I not sponsored by amazon??
However, there’s one problem. See, half the time the delivery people will just leave the boxes in front of my door:

However, the other half of the time, they will decide they need to leave them with the store underneath my apartment.

This is slightly uncomfortable.  I mean, I’m online shopping to AVOID interacting with people, remember?


How do you guys shop? Do you do it from your comfy couch (okay, futon) like me, or do you actually go out to the stores?

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Mayor Gia's First Thanksgiving

It’s not exactly a Bible story, but I'm retelling the story of the First Thanksgiving. Enjoy! [Also, linking up with yeahwrite!]

In 16somethingsomething, a bunch of Pilgrims came to America.

Yay, religious tolerance! How nice!

They brought supplies with them to get through the first winter in America.

They were in trouble.  But then the pilgrims met the natives.

The pilgrims didn’t really understand the native people or their ways.

The pilgrims were also kind of jerks.

Things started to look pretty bleak for the pilgrims. Until...

The native americans shared their harvest, and the pilgrims survived.

 And they were super grateful. For a solid five minutes.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Monday, November 19, 2012

I Don’t “Get” Turkey

 As Thanksgiving approaches, I have to admit something: I don’t get turkey. At all.

But I kind of remember turkey.

I never really enjoyed turkey. It was just so bland.  I actually kind of understand why people deep fry it.

Wasn't that a specialty at all the county fairs this year?

Here, this is the breakdown of a turkey: 

mmm...ass stuffing
Why don’t people just eat chicken? I remember chicken being much better tasting.

That's not even a little funny. I love ducks. FRIENDS NOT FOOD, DAMNIT!

Welp, it's a word now. 

Do you guys like turkey or do you agree that it’s gross? Chicken? Duck? Turducken?

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Not Having Power is Much More Unfortunate Than It Seems

As I stated on Monday, I lost power last Monday and did not get it back until Sunday afternoon. Let’s talk some more about that. And let me apologize that this post is kind of long and a bit rambly. I never thought I’d lose power for so long, so I wrote this and had to keep adding to it as I continued to not have power.

Monday was actually kind of fun and scary.  My neighbors and I hung out in our hallway and drank and ate pizza. It was like 72 degrees in my apartment. I was actually a little bit warm.

Tuesday was somewhat less fun, especially because I didn’t hear from Boyfriend.  The pizza place near me was running on a generator, so I did get a hot meal. 

No coffee though, so I had to drink a red bull.

Not good in the mornings

[Side note: Before anyone asks, my heat and hot water heater and stove are all electric, so I didn’t have anything warm. I also don’t own a grill or any kind of camping gear, so there was no way for me to make my own old fashioned coffee. Yes, I asked the pizza place if they had coffee. They told me to be grateful for the pizza. I was.]

I spent a lot of time in my car charging my cell phone. Not terribly exciting, but not awful. I lit a bunch of candles and hung out in the dark.

 Seriously, these are my candles:

It was getting a little chilly, but whatever. I like it cold and 64 wasn’t really that bad.

On Wednesday, I woke up and it was 57 degrees.

Luckily, I managed to have some hot water in my pipes. So I took a shower and went to work, where we had luxuries like electricity and coffee and internet.

I charged up all my shit, which was great. Boyfriend came over after work and we cuddled for about six hours. It was awesome.

In case you’re wondering, at that point Boyfriend offered to put me up in a hotel, if we could find one. The thing was, my utility company kept telling me that my estimated restoration time was soon (on Wed morning, it said 11 pm Wed.  Until later that night, when it switched to 11 pm Thursday….) I didn’t want to go through all the trouble if I was going to get power back shortly. He’s a very good Boyfriend.

Those are surprisingly effective.

Anyway, so I woke up on Thursday again with no power and it being 55 degrees.

That’s when it got really bad. I washed my hair in cold water and used candles to warm up.
I went to work again, where I found out more of my coworkers got their power back.

Apparently, if I’m cold, everyone should be.

It’s a really weird feeling, when you go to work and everything is normal with coffee and heat and internet, and you come home to a fucking post apocalyptic  nightmare.



When it's cold and dark, you don't want to do anything. I pretty much sat in my futon, cuddling my candle.

The utility company’s website reported that I should have service restored by 11 pm that night. I went to bed, dreaming of electricity (And wine. Because come on. Wine.) 

BUT THEN. The next day (Friday morning) I remained powerless and the website now claimed it’d be restored 8 pm on Friday night.

It feels like you can see my breath.
The restoration time got pushed back to 11 pm. Boyfriend got us a hotel room Friday night, because he felt sorry for me and is the best Boyfriend in the entire world. 

Then I got notice that the estimated restoration time was 8 pm SATURDAY night.

It was pretty hard for me to leave the nice warm internet filled hotel. 

It's an elevator.
On Saturday, I shockingly did not get power. The utility company (EVIL BASTARDS) said I’d get it by 3 pm Sunday. I checked a little while later, and it got bumped to 11 pm Monday.

It was 52 degrees when I woke up Sunday morning. Suddenly, the days of it being 57 degrees didn't seem so bad. 

In the afternoon, the utility company updated my restore time back to 11 pm that night. 

Around 3 pm I came in from doing laundry at a friend's house and OMG THE LIGHTS WERE ON!!

So I turned on all the lights and the heat in my apartment. Then I texted everyone in the world. 

And then I put my bottle of pinot grigio in the fridge. 

What I learned from this saga is that it IS a big deal to lose power, I have to buy all kinds of candles and better flashlights and camping gear, and that I need to invent a battery operated coffee pot.