And Then I Fell Down

It was great weather this weekend, so I went for a walk on Saturday.

And then out of nowhere, the stupid evil sidewalk jumped up and tripped me and I fell.

I skinned both my hands and knees pretty badly. I got up and powerwalked back to my apartment.

You guys, skinning your hands and knees HURTS. No wonder kids are always crying. Seriously.

I texted Boyfriend:

Luckily Boyfriend soon arrived with bandaids.

He patched me up as much as he could.

And I spent the rest of the night moaning about my injuries.

DARD: Spring Update

Me: Why, hello ducky!

Ducky: Hi Gia

Me: How’s ducks against raping ducks going?

Ducky: Um, okay.

Me: Just okay?

Ducky: Well, we’ve definitely cut down on local duck rape.

Me: Congrats!

Ducky: But have you watched the news? Human rape is a real problem!

Me: I know, I know.

Ducky: Like those two recent cases of girls being raped while they’re unconscious and later committing suicide because the rapists took pictures of it and they were tormented about it at school? 

Me: I know, it’s horrible

Ducky: Fuck yeah it is! Ducks don’t even do that to each other, Gia. DUCKS.

Me: Yep

Ducky: AND WE’RE THE RAPIEST OF ALL ANIMALS.

Me: Rape culture is a problem here

Ducky: Yeah, no fucking joke that rape culture is a problem! Why do you teach girls not to get raped instead of teaching boys not to rape? It blames the victim!

Me: Well I personally don’t I mean I’m a feminist…

Ducky: You know what I mean.

Me: I can’t answer this question. 

Ducky: It’s terrible. I mean, what’s the point of giving out rape whistles if unconscious people are getting raped?!?! HMM??

Me: Not sure…

Ducky: I need to come up with a new pamphlet to hand out.

Me: Oh yeah?

Ducky: Yep, something like this:

 

Ducky is a real go-getter

4/20! You Know What That Means!

For me and Boyfriend this year, nothing.

No getting potted up this year for us!

I don’t really care about weed, but as I have written before, Boyfriend occasionally partakes. 4/20 fell on Saturday, which is also his carb day. It would have been perfect. If he had any weed.

It’s Boyfriend’s duty to smoke on 4/20! As a lover of freedom and weed!

Sigh. If only.

Bras and Other Random Things

This post is a total mishmash of stuff.

First. Did anyone see this story about bras?

To sum up:

It says that bras aren’t good for women, really (and in fact, can do more long term harm than good, in terms of sagginess).

Second. Game of Thrones [SPOILER ALERT!]

Soooo…. I watched the third episode of the season. This happened:

What? I have the hots for incest knight.

Third. How’s work going, you ask?

Fuck what, Gia?

There, I told you this was a mishmash. Excuse me, I need to go hang out in my new favorite place.