Me: Hey Popsicle
Popsicle: Hey Gia! Ready for the football game?
Me: Yeah yeah. Actually, I wanted to talk to you about
something. I think you know what.
Popsicle: Nope, no idea
Me: Yes you do. That thing you did last week.
Popsicle: NOPE.
Me: Well then. Time to get shamed:
Popsicle: AHHHHHH!
Me: Popsicle, how could you! You used to care so much about the
environment!
Popsicle: I do I do, but I accidentally threw away a glass jar...
Me: NOT RECYCLE, Popsicle? Really?
Popsicle: It was ONE time.
Me: Sure, and it’s just one more iceberg melting…
Popsicle: Stop it
Me: POLAR BEARS ARE GONNA BE EXTINCT.
Popsicle: Damnit Gia! Stop making me feel bad! You’re not perfect
either!
Me: Yes I am! I won the Girlfriend Olympics!
Popsicle: Oh really? Well how about this!
Me: Well played, sir.
Lessons learned: Always recycle. And don't get caught drinking Boyfriend's wine.
Drinking some of his wine is kind of recycling, right?
ReplyDeleteMy confession: I have Twisted Sister un-ironically on my iPod (not an advertisement) multiple songs. And I will rock out in my car when it comes on. Okay, not really that much of a confession, but what do you want, "I regularly tongue kiss homeless people because I feel guilty not giving them spare change and want them to feel good?" My lawyer said not to make that my confession.
Recycling is important. Also, it is a well-known fact that wine, when left out, is prone to evaporation. You can't help it if Boyfriend doesn't drink it fast enough.
ReplyDeleteI'm an avid recycler. If it can be recycled, I put it in the proper container. I'm committed to doing my part... or maybe I should just be committed?
ReplyDeleteAlso, work on the wine stealing.. I mean sharing skills.
Might want to remind Popsicle that "snitches get stiches." Just saying.
ReplyDeletethis may be my favorite post ever. you are HILARIOUS.
ReplyDeleteDrinking Boyfriend's wine is kind of a public service. At least, if I were doing it it would be... because if I'm eyeballing someone else's wine, then it's a sure sign I need a drink :P
ReplyDeleteI got a picture of my gf holding up a sign that says "I give bad blowjobs."
ReplyDeleteIt was supposed to be a funny example of the boyfriend/girlfriend shaming post I did, but there MAY have been a little bit of choice into the sign I made...
THINK OF THE CHILDREN!
What about boyfriend shaming? Certainly he's done something shameful.
ReplyDeleteI absolutely love the concept of a polar bear who does not recycle.
ReplyDeleteOh Popsicle....
ReplyDeleteOh dear ... I'm feeling a little nervous now. I don't recycle because I'm totally lazy. Yep, I'm single handedly destroying the planet.
ReplyDeleteI have a friend that doesn't recycle and she cannot be shamed! I don't even get it, because here we have tubs the city provides where we throw all our recycling, no sorting necessary, and then put it out on the curb on trash day. Its just as easy to recycles as it is to throw it in the trash! She says she doesn't like having to rinse it out. Sheesh!
ReplyDeleteHa, nice guilt tripping the Polar Bear into recycling!
ReplyDeletepoor Popsicle :)
ReplyDeleteHa! I've totally done that. What? You get up and leave the room, that glass of wine is fair play. It's not MY fault someone has a little bladder!
ReplyDeleteHAhaa! I do the exact same thing! If people want to keep their alcohol, they need to guard their glass. REally, it's my husband's fault his drinks keep on disappearing.
ReplyDeletepopsicle is ever so cute :)
ReplyDelete