Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Then Boyfriend Electrocuted Me

So, I’ve been having some bad muscle/neck pain lately. I’ve been getting some quick massages, which helps. Boyfriend also enjoys rubbing my shoulders when he comes over.



Anyhoo, Boyfriend recently saw a groupon for an electronic pulse massager and got it for me.




It arrived last weekend. Here’s a photo:


Essentially it was shaped like a small ipod, and attached to two electrode pads. It also came with slippers for massaging your feet.


To be honest, I had been a little concerned about hooking myself up to electrodes and sending pulses through my body.





So I tried it.




Boyfriend encouraged me to try all six modes.


The last one is a combination of the previous 5. So you don’t know when it’s fine and when it’s about to turn painful. I sense this is a problem.











Has anyone else tried this torture device massager? [And to be fair, the product totally worked. In a terrifying, awful way.]

14 comments:

  1. You are a very funny lady!

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  2. That's hilarious! Now that you've tried electro-shock therapy, the next logical step is leeches.

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  3. No comment. Pickleope wins. XD

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  4. I'll leave the testing to you!

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  5. that makes me think of how Brookstone sells all those fancy "massagers" but we know what they really are. We know.

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  6. no no no just the thought of that no no no, also i would be scared of my heart explode...you never know

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  7. My wife won't buy a machine. I'm too good at giving massages so she says she doesn't need one.

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  8. I have one of those Homedic Shiatsu massaging chair pads. It feels wonderful! Similar to the massage chairs when you're having a pedicure. The only problem is it doesn't reach my neck, which is where most of my pain and tension are. :(

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  9. I have never tried such a device. If anyone invents an electric back scratcher, however, I'm in.

    Love,
    Janie

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  10. I am too cheap to pay for anything that fancy and my boyfriend doesn't exist.

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  11. Heehee! I have one (a TENS unit) that I use on a regular basis for my herniated disks...it can feel creepy if you crank it up too high. Your version is way more amusing than mine!

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  12. YESSSSS!!! I've tried this horrible device. A coworker brought it in and insisted on hooking it up to me. That mothereffing thing HURTS!!!! I did not enjoy it and pretty sure it's the devils device.

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  13. Haha!! My Mom bought me one of those things--a Dr. Ho (yes, really) and it was the same thing: incredibly painful. Like a sharp, intense pinch that was the complete opposite of relaxation. In fact, I'm having body-memory-flashbacks as I type. ;)

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  14. I was trained to use one of those on people's throats to teach or reteach them to swallow. I used it with one client and never did again. I do not like it. It feels bad.

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