Wednesday, June 26, 2013

I’m Considering Becoming Amish

Texting between Boyfriend and me:

Boyfriend: I just had an Amish soft pretzel. Best food ever.

Boyfriend: Those Amish soak everything in butter.

Me: I should be Amish.
Boyfriend: Good luck with that.
Me: Do Amish have hair straighteners?

Boyfriend: Yes.
Me:  I could totes be Amish then. Easy peasy.
Boyfriend: I know some people. I could get you in. butter heaven.
Me: I don’t do bonnets, btw.

Me: Do Amish eat cake?
Boyfriend: Yes.
Me: Perfect.

Seriously. What’s not to love about being amish? You get soft pretzels and cake and things in butter. And I heard they can use cell phones because those don’t have cords, so I can still get my internet. Where’s the bad?

I think I’m leaning towards becoming Amish, guys!

Welp, it was worth a list.  


  1. I've seen the movies Witness and Kingpin, hence, I know everything there is to know about the Amish. Hence, the only way I would be Amish is if I get to be on permanent Rumspringa (look it up, non-Amish-experts).

    1. I know all about that, thank you TLC reality shows...

  2. I've seen that movie Sex Drive (?) Pretty sure that's what it's called, where Seth Green is Amish. I think the Amish must live exactly like should do it. You could be mayor of your town.

  3. I bet you would be really good at churning that butter though and quilting

  4. I might be into trying out an Amish camp or something. But I don't think I would want to be Amish permanently.

  5. I would like to be Amish and drive my horse and buggy through the city, with traffic lined up behind me for miles and everyone honking and shouting obscenities at me.


  6. I hear their women are very plain. Therefore you would be a GODDESS TO THEM.

  7. How can someone not believe in alcohol?!? That's like not believing in Santa Claus!!




  8. Yay! I can be Amish. I don't drink, but I don't eat any of the stuff on the list, so....never mind.

  9. Amish country is gorgeous but I could never. I need to drive places.