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Friday, March 15, 2013

St Patty's Day Kitty


Me: Hi Miss Priscilla. Come to shame me about my drinking again?
Miss Priscilla: I lurve you gia.
Me: Oh wow. Kitty, you are drunk.
Miss Priscilla: No YOU’RE DRUNK.
Me: Miss Priscilla...
Miss Priscilla: I can’t help it! It’s the St Patty's day parties! Do you know what Irish Car Bombs are?
Me: Yes…
Miss Priscilla: WELL I DIDN’T! Hiccup. But now I do. Theyre gooooooooooood.
Me: Um.
Miss Priscilla: Goooooooooooood.
Me: How much have you had?
Miss Priscilla: I can’t math right now Gia.
Me: Okay.
Miss Priscilla: I’m a cat.
Me: I know.
Miss Priscilla: Hey some of us are going to to go skinny dipping later yawanna come?
Me: No thanks.
Miss Priscilla: Please?
Me: You’re a cat. You can’t really go skinny dipping you know. All you have is fur.
Miss Priscilla: Why why why you gotta be such a buzzkill
Me: Also you don’t like water.
Miss Priscilla: YOU DON’T WIKE LATER! I mean I mean like whatever. Water. Yeah.
Me: Can you swim?
Miss Priscilla: Yes. But not the doggy paddle. FUCK THAT. It’s a kitty paddle.
Me: Okay. Well, have fun drinking and kitty paddling. For the record, I don’t think this is a good idea.
Miss Priscilla: Hiccup. Uh oh
Me: Oh no oh no please don’t throw up on my rug!!
Miss Priscilla: I’m sorry I cant help- BLAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHH
Me: Ew.

As it turns out, kitty can’t hold her liquor. What are you guys doing for St. Patty's Day?



8 comments:

  1. Oh boy, I think Miss Priscilla has hit on everything that offends the true Irish about the U.S. celebration of St. Patrick's Day. The IRA will not be happy with her, and Denis Leary may be mildly miffed. And if this were Boston, Mark Wahlberg and Ben Affleck might try to make a movie about her.

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  2. Ugh, St. Patty's Day. Just another day specifically created to remind me how lame I am. What are we going to do? Sit at home and drink a box of wine...or just sit at home. Okay, let's be real. We may forget that it's St. Patty's day at all, actually.

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  3. Way to not post my comment Internet! I'll be crawling around manhattan. Miss Priscilla is welcome. I'll hold her fur back if necessary.

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  5. What did Miss Priscilla have???

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  6. Not half as much fun as Miss Priscilla!

    ReplyDelete