My (Not So) Secret Addiction

To what, you ask?

Sigh. I kind of don’t want to tell you guys. But I will. Because honesty is my policy.

PLEASE DON’T JUDGE ME.  

But seriously guys. Friday nights with Boyfriend have pretty much turned into this:

Is there a support group for people like me? I need help.

Mayor Gia’s Creation Story

[Linking up with yeahwrite and the speakeasy!]

Okay, if anyone gets offended by this post, let me first tell you that Boyfriend gave me this idea.

The basic premise is that I’m going to retell Bible stories for you, through my interpretation. You’re welcome, world. We’re starting with the Creation Story.

Well, there’s two creation stories back to back in the Bible…I think this one is the second one. Not where God created everything and then men and women and then he rested. The one where he created man first and created stuff around man for him to play with. (Yeah, I don’t know too many Bible stories. No, I have not consulted a Bible in this blog post.) Okay, here we go.

In the beginning, God created man.

Yes, in my drawings God is a cloud.

I figured heart boxers are more fun than fig leaves.

God then created plants for man to frolick in.

Okay then, for man to hang out in.

FINE. Then God created animals for man to name.

Click to make bigger. So you can admire my work more. 

Boyfriend Man and his fishing...

God realized man needed a companion.

And then God created Gia Woman.

And then God created regret.

The End.

Onion Goggles

You guys ever have one of those frustrating moments when you think of a GREAT idea and find out it’s already been invented?

This is how it started. I was cutting an onion:

And all of a sudden my eyes starting tearing up.

You know, because I'm a vegetarian.

And then I had a brilliant idea: ONION GOGGLES!

  

Unfortunately, then I told twitter. And they informed me it had already been invented.

I hate being thwarted

I coulda been rich.

So, two questions for you all:

Have you ever thought of something awesome that has already been invented?

Do you have any tricks to onion cutting? I can’t buy these onion goggles out of principle. 

Awards and Olympics, Oh My!

I love the Olympics. And not only because there is literally nothing good on tv and I was going to be forced to watch toddlers and tiaras til the end of summer. I’m a big fan of the major events – swimming, gymnastics, tennis (is tennis not a major one? It is to me).  But watching non stop coverage has made me appreciate the lesser known ones, like kayaking (paddling?) and fencing. And I've been watching a LOT.

Notice we're on the comfy futon.

Crushing my olympic dreams. Le sigh.

In honor of the Olympics, I thought I’d pass along some awards that I’ve been hoarding. I present to you:

The BLOGGER OLYMPICS

(or, here’s some awards).

Firstly, the awards. Some of them are really old, because I’m slow and I like to do awards in bunches. My apologies.

Thank you to Lettuce Be Clear,   What Inside Voice,  and For the Love of Writing for passing on the Kreativ Blogger Award.

And thank you to Contemplating Happiness,   Write, Rinse, Repeat. , and  Angela Shelton for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award.

Now as part of the Blogger Olympics, I’d like give these “medals” (awards?) to the following kick ass blogs:

Charlotte’s Web 

Blather by Bubbe 

Misty’s Laws 

Handflapping  

Creative Devolution 

The Pish Posh 

(Pick whichever is your favorite. And I don’t remember the rules but if you want to follow them, tell us seven things about yourself.  The weirder, the better.)

If you need me, I'll be tweeting about the olympics.

Spoiler alert: this will be a topic next week.