Kitty Couch

Me: Hi Miss Priscilla!

Miss Priscilla: Sniff

Me: What’s going on?

Miss Priscilla: Other cats have been on this couch. I can smell them. Hmph.

Me: Oh come on, I spent hours trying to get all the cat hair off it. It’s ours  now!

Miss Priscilla: No more other stinky cats on it?

Me: No sadly, you’re my only cat right now.

Miss Priscilla: What do you mean, sadly?

Me: Nothing.

Miss Priscilla: Well fine, I will own this couch then.

Me: Wait a second –

Miss Priscilla: No no, you’ve sold me on it Gia. The couch is mine now.

Me: Well it’s OURS you see…

Miss Priscilla: I AM THE ONLY ONE ALLOWED TO SIT ON IT AND THAT’S MY FINAL WORD.

Me: This really isn’t fair.

Miss Priscilla: Get off my couch, Gia. Your futon is right there.

Me: Ever heard of sharing?

Miss Priscilla: Ever heard of GETTING OFF MY COUCH?

Me: UGH. Fine.

Miss Priscilla: I’ll let you know if I require anything else.

Me: I kind of hate you right now.

Miss Priscilla: I don’t care.

Just like owning a real  live cat!

Kitty Hangover

Me: So how did your St Patty’s Day celebrations go?

Miss Priscilla: Ungh. Stop talking.

Me: Miss Priscilla, we were supposed to do this interview on Monday! You can’t still be hungover.

Miss Priscilla: Why are you screaming.

Me: I’m not screaming I’m talking like normal-

Miss Priscilla: Shhhhh Gia.

Me: *whispering * how was your weekend?

Miss Priscilla: From what I can remember, it was fun.

Me: Really? Eat anything green?

Miss Priscilla: I’ve been throwing up green for the past 4 days. Don’t talk about green.

Me: I see. So you don’t want any spinach, or broccoli?

Miss Priscilla: Gia, I’m warning you…

Me: Chocolate chip mint ice cream?

Miss Priscilla: BLAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHH

Me: Well. I suppose I deserved that.

Me: Anyway, meet anyone fun?

Miss Priscilla: Ummm, I don’t know…

Me: Oh really? Because I found this picture of you sleeping…

Miss Priscilla: GASP HOW DID YOU GET THAT GIA?!

Me: IN BED WITH A DOG, MISS PRISCILLA!

Miss Priscilla: I WAS DRUNK!

Me: I thought you thought dogs were all slobbery mutts!

Miss Priscilla: I do, I do! But we were drunk and he kind of looks a little like a cat…

Me: No he doesn’t.

Miss Priscilla: If you squint…

Me: No, he doesn’t

Miss Priscilla: Shut up, Gia. It’s not like you don’t have anything to be ashamed of! I SAW HOW MUCH COOKIE DOUGH YOU ATE ON SATURDAY.

Me: Why do you have to go there? IT WAS WHOLE WHEAT FLOUR!

Miss Priscilla: THAT DOESN’T MAKE IT HEALTHY

Me: What’s mr. loverboy’s name?

Miss Priscilla: Fuck you!

Me: Fuck YOU!

Damn, living with cats is hard.

St Patty's Day Kitty

Me: Hi Miss Priscilla. Come to shame me about my drinking again?

Miss Priscilla: I lurve you gia.

Me: Oh wow. Kitty, you are drunk.

Miss Priscilla: No YOU’RE DRUNK.

Me: Miss Priscilla...

Miss Priscilla: I can’t help it! It’s the St Patty's day parties! Do you know what Irish Car Bombs are?

Me: Yes…

Miss Priscilla: WELL I DIDN’T! Hiccup. But now I do. Theyre gooooooooooood.

Me: Um.

Miss Priscilla: Goooooooooooood.

Me: How much have you had?

Miss Priscilla: I can’t math right now Gia.

Me: Okay.

Miss Priscilla: I’m a cat.

Me: I know.

Miss Priscilla: Hey some of us are going to to go skinny dipping later yawanna come?

Me: No thanks.

Miss Priscilla: Please?

Me: You’re a cat. You can’t really go skinny dipping you know. All you have is fur.

Miss Priscilla: Why why why you gotta be such a buzzkill

Me: Also you don’t like water.

Miss Priscilla: YOU DON’T WIKE LATER! I mean I mean like whatever. Water. Yeah.

Me: Can you swim?

Miss Priscilla: Yes. But not the doggy paddle. FUCK THAT. It’s a kitty paddle.

Me: Okay. Well, have fun drinking and kitty paddling. For the record, I don’t think this is a good idea.

Miss Priscilla: Hiccup. Uh oh

Me: Oh no oh no please don’t throw up on my rug!!

Miss Priscilla: I’m sorry I cant help- BLAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHH

Me: Ew.

As it turns out, kitty can’t hold her liquor. What are you guys doing for St. Patty's Day?

Trivets: The Conclusion

So, in case you missed it, I bought trivet kits for me and Boyfriend for Christmas. A couple of weeks ago, we finally finished them.  Ta-DA! 

Boyfriend’s:

Mine:

YEAH! 

Miss Priscilla Puffington got a sniff of em.

Miss Priscilla: What. Is. This.

Me: It’s a trivet, Miss Priscilla!

Miss Priscilla: Hmmm.

Me: What’s that mean?

Miss Priscilla: I could have done this better.

Me: Not without thumbs, bitch.

Miss Priscilla: What was that?

Me: Nothing, kitty!

Miss Priscilla: Gia.

Me: Yes?

Miss Priscilla: There are a LOT of wine corks here.

Me: Oh, hush.

Miss Priscilla: I mean, a lot a lot.

Me: I don’t think so.

Miss Priscilla: How much do you drink?

Me: They were amassed over quite awhile.

Miss Priscilla: …

Me: They were!

Miss Priscilla: What’s in this can?

Miss Priscilla: OMG THESE ARE ALL THE LEFTOVER ONES?!

Me: Yes…for our next cork project….

Miss Priscilla: Gia!

Me: What?

Miss Priscilla: YOU NEED HELP!

Me: There’s not that many there. And some are Boyfriends.

Miss Priscilla: I judge you based on the amount of corks you have.

Me: Fine. I’m going to start getting screw top bottles.

100th Post! And Miss Priscilla Puffington, III.

Exciting news everyone! Today is my 100^th post! YAY FOR BLOG MILESTONES!!

As I referenced last week, I’m ready to introduce to you guys to Boyfriend’s other Valentine’s Day gift to me. Here she is:

She has a pink bow on. It's hard to see.

Boyfriend knows I can’t have a cat right now (or maybe ever), so he found me a kitty that looks just like the Valentine’s Day kitty I interviewed, bow and all. See:

So anyway, I soon found out that Miss Priscilla is a bit of a snootypants.

Me: Hi Priscilla!

Priscilla: A-hem?

Me: What?

Priscilla: It’s MISS Priscilla. Or Miss Puffington.

Me: Excuseeee me, your highness.

Miss Priscilla: Are you mocking me!?

Me: Never! So, tell me a little about yourself, Miss Priscilla

Crankypants.

Miss Priscilla: I don’t know if I like your tone, Gia. But I was born Miss Priscilla Petunia Puffington, III.

Me: Wow. Are you joking?

Miss Priscilla: What is funny about my name??

Me: Nevermind, nothing.

Miss Priscilla: I’m hungry. What time does the caviar get served?

Me: Uh oh.

Miss Priscilla: Uh oh?!

Me: Look, I’m poor.  There’s no caviar here.

Miss Priscilla: Fresh tuna?

Me: HA! More like dry kitty food.

Miss Priscilla: Like they give the strays at the shelter?

Me: Yep, exactly.

Miss Priscilla: I’m not sure I like this. I’m used to being treated like royalty. And a certain level of class and sophistication.

Me: Just wait til you meet Allie.

So, Priscilla MISS Priscilla is still adjusting. She’s lucky she’s fluffy and adorable.