Signs

On Saturday, I went grocery shopping and noticed a new parking spot sign. 

Then I noticed another sign on the spot right next to that one:

 

Well, ok.  First, let me say that I'm totally fine with courtesy spaces for people who don't have a handicapped plate but may otherwise have a condition/situation that would be helped by parking closer. Sure. 

But - aren't these really specific signs? I mean, what happens if the pregnant lady parks in the toddler spot? Exactly how old does a kid have to be before they age out of the toddler spot? What if you have a little kid that can't toddle yet?

And, what about other things that should justify getting a close parking spot?

I propose the addition of the following parking spot signs:

FACT: thousands of millenials die each year by texting and walking into traffic. Let millenials park closer and save lives. 

You know what happens when you hold your pee too long? Bladder infections. FACT: bladder infections lead to DEATH. Let people who have to pee park closer and save lives. 

FACT: Cats are awesome and I deserve to park closer because of it. 

*Grits teeth* I will not make two trips from the car to my apartment. 

People who want to carry their groceries are heroes and therefore should be rewarded for their valor. 

People who go to parties are cool. Cool people get better spots. That's how the cookie crumbles. 

People who try new recipes are courageous and we should accommodate their need to pick up just one more thing. 

[Trigger warning] These people are the victims of weather. Would you really further victimize these weather victims by making them park far away? 

And finally:

These superpeople/gods/aliens/machines/hulks/bat hybrids/cat hybrids have SAVED HUMANITY. At the very least,  should they not be allowed to park 10-12 feet closer than us mere mortals? 


What parking spot sign would you add?

#$&@#! You, Apple

also known as “What It’s Like to Update Your Apple Products”

[Linking up with yeahwrite!]

So my iphone updated last week to iOs 7. It’s not a huge deal, though I had no idea it was coming. 

But I realized that it takes up kind of a lot of room, and the free space on my iphone was getting pretty low.

  

Note: camera roll vs photo stream is incredibly confusing. Fuck whoever invented it.

So I got on my macbook to sync it with this mysterious cloud.

Ok, that wasn’t quite it. But I had to spend $20 to upgrade my macbook. I vaguely remembered something about an upgrade when it first came out, but spending $20 on something unnecessary at the time? Pssssshaw! 

Anyway, I bit the bullet and downloaded it.

An hour later, it finished downloading.

Finally, it rebooted and I had my latest operating system up.

So I upgraded my iPhoto and restarted my computer again.

Then I did something called “losing it”

So, I let my iphoto finish updating all my photos, and finally – FINALLY – got my iphone photos synced/backed up with icloud and iphoto.

But at least that’s done. Until apple comes out with another system upgrade.

If anyway needs  me, I’ll be mourning the loss of my weekend.

Losing Electricity is my Vietnam

As some of you might remember, I had to go about a week without power after the hurricane last year. It was horrible:

He being Boyfriend, of course. It was dark.

It was cold.

I lost the will to live. 

So I came home from work last Thursday, and my street had no power. I had lost power for a moment or two during some thunderstorms, but my neighbors said the power had been out for awhile this time. 

 

Seriously, what is this fuckery.  

So I sat down on my futon.

  

I texted my friends and family and posted on facebook via my iphone.

I thought about all the food that was going bad in my fridge.

I reflected on my life.

I checked my phone.

I kept waiting.

And then, when all hope was lost, the lights came back on!

So yeah. I only lost power for an hour. But it FELT like a really long time and totes gave me hurricane flashbacks. What am I going to do in the fall when the hurricanes come back?!?!