Monday, December 10, 2012

And then DISASTER STRUCK


[Linking up with yeahwrite!]

So, Boyfriend and I went out on Saturday night to dinner and a movie. We rarely go out, because a. we kind of hate people and b. we’re always a little nervous about running into someone from work, because they still don’t know we’re dating.

And if you’re new to the blog, there’s a significant age difference between me and Boyfriend.


Anyways, so we were at the movies last night, walking towards our theater.


And we turn a corner and BAM! come face to face with ex coworker.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the face of BUSTED.

Ex-coworker, clearly shocked, made a few minutes of uncomfortable small talk/babbling about the movie she was seeing. 

Boyfriend and I appeared to be normal

But in our heads? It was like this:





 Yep. But this is what we did:


Ex-coworker made a hasty exit.



Boyfriend and I went into our movie, shell shocked.
   


(It was actually a good movie though. Silver Linings Playbook. Go see it.)




  
When we got back to my apartment, Boyfriend already had an email from ex coworker. Something along the lines of “Don’t get me wrong, I like Gia a lot…but isn’t she a little young?”

Which honestly, isn’t even THAT bad of an email.  However,  I do have a bunch of a good responses lined up if we ever get asked that in person:






Anyway, then Boyfriend and I got drunk.

We use redbox a lot.


And that was my weekend.

64 comments:

  1. HA! I love that Boyfriend (by the way, can we get a different moniker for him, I feel uncomfortable referring to your boyfriend as Boyfriend. Not like you have to give us his real name. I may be overthinking this.) lit himself on fire. Hope everything works out for you two and no trouble comes from this.

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  2. Umm, that second one. Don't do it. Ever. Please don't even joke about it. It is totally the opposite of funny. In many workplaces it could get the guy fired, or at the least sent away to the PC corrective services gulag for re-education.

    And really now, cute as it is, if you feel you have to hide your relationship from your coworkers, then something isn't right. That's not to say you trumpet every new date to the rafters. Nor do you need to put up someone on the company intranet. But active hiding? There has to be some middle ground there.

    Sorry to be all serious here, in a blog that is meant to be light hearted and funny, but some things are not funny.

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    1. Thanks, Keith. I'm sure Boyfriend appreciates your concern about not getting him fired. To set a couple of things straight so as to not panic anyone who reads this post after you:

      The "hiding" thing: Yes, we're hiding it. Because we don't want anyone to know. It's actually 100% okay by our company policy, so we're not doing anything wrong. It's a very small organization, and we don't need or want people knowing our business. Naturally, we're only *so* careful, because we did go out to a movie on a saturday night. We knew we'd inevitably run into someone.

      Also, I know you don't know my company, but the raise thing is a totally ridiculous statement on my part for a multitude of reasons (the first being that Boyfriend has no authority over my department at all). Even if I did ever actually say it to someone, it probably wouldn't be the most inappropriate thing said that day. See http://mayorgia.blogspot.com/2012/07/sexual-harassment-and-boyfriend.html for a refresher.

      In conclusion: A. thank you for your comment, because I know it came from a well meaning place, B. my love life is none of my coworkers' business and C. don't worry everyone, Boyfriend's job is not in danger, pretty much nomatter what I say about him.

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    2. Gia,
      I've been meaning to talk to you about your job situation. I'm afraid that your position is no longer available.....And, I'm moving to Montana.

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    3. Wait, what? YOU TOLD ME IF I DATED YOU THEN I WOULD BE ABLE TO KEEP MY JOB!!

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    4. Ok, one last bit of serious, then I'll settle down to enjoy the ongoing humour. I can understand that your coworkers know the work situation and realize that Boyfriend isn't your boss, and has nothing to do with your department, and would see the humour in it. However there have been cases like yours, where the man was "convicted" because he knew the people that did have control over that woman's raises and promotions. The tribunal (yeah, not a real court) found the woman could reasonably fear he could "pull strings". Again, not saying that could happen in your case. It's sad to say that humour can get out of hand very quickly. I mind those two Aussie radio hosts.
      And re: the age difference. Your relationship is none of anybody else's business. You are under no obligation to tell them. You know your own circumstances best. But the longer it goes on, and really if you guys are happy I wish you all the best, the more it looks like you have something to hide. Like there is something you are ashamed of. It is a fine line, but I suspect with co-worker seeing you together you might have to re-evaluate. Which you probably already were thinking.
      Age ain't nothing but a number. Coworker phrased herself very badly.
      And, Boyfriend, MONTANA??? Sheesh, do you know how cold it gets this time of year? Plus, frozen zombie sluts would be Gia's next big fear, which would probably make a hilarious post.

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    5. Keith, not to get all serious here again or anything, but Gia and Boyfriend AREN'T REALLY CARTOON CHARACTERS EITHER. Whew. Once I accepted that, I could enjoy this blog for the light-hearted humor it has ;)

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    6. GIA AND BOYFRIEND AREN'T CARTOON CHARACTERS?! I feel like my whole life has been a lie! Please tell me the ducks that are against duck rape are real ducks. Otherwise, I don't know how I will go on living.

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  3. Keith up abovw me kind stole my thunder, but I do have to say that your relationship is none of your co-workers business. As long as the two of you aren't haven't sex in bathroom stalls or interrupting business, who cares?

    And as for the comment of the ex-coworker....ugh. I'm sure that comment is exactly the reason why you're hiding this relationship in the first place. Get a life.

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    Replies
    1. So wait. Bathroom stall sex...that's a no-no? Um, excuse me, I have something to take care of.

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  4. I have a friend who has a 15 year age difference between herself and her husband. It works for them. So as long as you're not like 15 and its illegal...sheesh nosy coworkers. Step off!

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  5. Personally, I think the phrase "isn't she a little young for you?" sounds kind of ridiculous, particularly in this context. I mean, sure, there's an age gap, but she makes it sound like you're 18 and he's Hugh Hefner, which is definitely not the case.

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  6. Your boyfriend burning himself in effigy was hilarious and wrong. As is your whole blog, which is exactly why everyone loves it. Obviously you imbue a lot of humor and exaggeration into your blog for entertainment purposes. Creative license. I thought that was "understood" by the blogging community.

    I am curious about how much of an age difference you have? I've got ten years with my husband, and my mom had 15 years with her boyfriend, and my grandmother had 20 years with my grandfather. Ain't no big thang and it ain't nobody's business but your own. *Hair flip.*

    "Isn't she a little young for you," is really, really rude. I mean, use a brain filter, ex-co-worker, geez!

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    Replies
    1. It's 30 years and it is gross. So, yeah, she is a little young for me. She would be only slightly too old for my son. Her mom is a more appropriate age for me. Sheesh, we gotta break up!!! Thanks Mandy_Fish, you've helped me sort this out.

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    2. Oh ha ha Boyfriend, you're hilaaaarious.

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    3. My friend and I have a joke about hair flipping equaling flipping people off, which made this twice as hilarious.

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  7. I hate it when I have to light myself on fire to get out of an awkward situation!!

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  8. Wow, so you think ex-coworker is going to out you guys? Perhaps that's a good thing, that way you can get it out in the open.

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  9. I like to respond to such questions as "Isn't she a bit young for you?" with "Yeah? And you're ugly" because I'm mature.

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    Replies
    1. And that's why we might be soul mates.

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    2. You and me, I mean. Lady soulmates.

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  10. Way to hold your ground! I think I would have needed to run away. I'm glad Boyfriend didn't actually set himself on fire because of super-judgy people...no one likes to be judged openly.

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  11. I once dated a guy 10 years younger than me. We had some fun for awhile but we didn't really have a lot in common. Maybe if the sex had been better ... wait - did I say that out loud? Geez, my bad. Now you'll all have pictures in your head of a grandma having sex! You're welcome! (Of course that was 16 years ago and I wasn't a grandma then ;)

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  12. I don't know what to say other than LMFAO! Sorry you ran into that rude bitch. I can't believe she actually sent him an email. Absolutely NONE of her business.

    Boyfriends replies are great.

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  13. I find that really brazen that the ex-coworker sent the email. I think some people are under the illusion that you can say whatever shit you think and it doesn't count because you didn't say it out loud.

    I don't think it is anyone else's business what the age gap is. If it works for you and Boyfriend..it guess it works for everyone that matters.

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  14. I know it wasn't necessarily a rude email but it was rude to send it. How does one even think it is okay to do that? She's a real "slit"! ;-)

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  15. My bf and I had to sneak around for a few months.. We weren't doing anything wrong, it's just a small area, and we didn't want to get the crap teased out of us. Well, someone in my kitchen staff busted us, and I had to hear every variation of the latest spanish pop songs sung with our story for quite a while.

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  16. sooner or later, that's bound to happen (bumping into the very people we want to avoid) but it's really none of her business to shoot an email on your being too young for boyfriend.
    unless she is boyfriend's best friend ... but if she was then he would have told her about the relationship even as it began.

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  17. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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    1. Can I undelete? My bad. i thought this was a duplicate and it wasn't. MY BAD EVERYONE!

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    2. I think you can go into the comments section of blogger and undelete it.

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  18. This was great. "I have the Benjamin Button disease," is totally what you should say when people comment on the age gap.

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  19. Secrets always come out! We found out at my work that one of my ex-coworkers is a porn star, and then from us finding out, her family found out, because my coworker's husband is this gal's cousin. So, just tell your coworkers that story if they find out about you and Boyfriend, and your situation won't seem nearly so shocking :)

    But, seriously, that woman was rude! Why is it any of her business what your age difference is. If it works for the two of you, then that is all that matters. Age doesn't matter at all to me. I would gladly date a younger man, for instance :)

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  20. What a bitch! "Isn't she a little young?!" FUCK THAT SHIT. You handled that much better than I would have, as you can see. :)

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  21. Next time you see her, you should keep in in the vagina for that "isn't she young for you?" comment. That pisses me right off.

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  22. If you get caught again, you can always pretend you're two "friends" out to see a movie. I'm sure you're quite friendly with one another.

    Love,
    Janie

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  23. "Isn't she a little young for you?" Like you're not standing right there. Wow, that was bitchy.

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  24. I hate people too. I think it's hilarious she sent an e-mail judging you. Hilarious! And thanks for the tip ... I was wondering if Silver Linings Playbook was worth it. I won't go to the movies, though. I wait for video always.

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  25. I love how pink Boyfriend gets when he's embarrassed. Maybe because I'm a whole-body blusher, too.

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  26. That is so rude "I like Gia and all but isn't she a little young". It's none of your business PAL.

    I like calling people pal when I'm angry at them.

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    Replies
    1. Agreed! And people never say stuff like that out of genuine concern. They say it because they're petty bitches.

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  27. "I have that Benjamin Button disease." Love it. This should always and forever be your answer when anyone so rudely comments on your age difference.

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  28. So the ex co-worker emailed before you even got back from the movie? Isn't she precious. I think she wants boyfriend for herself.

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  29. "Racist." lol I got a great laugh out of this!

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  30. I do love how she felt compelled to comment, having no idea how long the two of you had been together!

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  31. LOL! My husband is 10 years older than me (I'm 25, he's 35), and we've gotten the weird looks and comments, too. People can be lame. I love those internal reactions! haha I hate people, too!

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  32. Just found your blog and it just became my favourite. You got me at this post (okay, your name too... since we both have the same name)

    Gia @ Lovely Serendipity

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  33. That was quite a ride - your post and all the comments. Age differences are the least of anyone's concern in this life. Who the hell knows what might happen an hour from now much less years down the road. Love and laughter that's what matters. And it seems like you've got that covered.

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  34. So awesome! My hubs is 5 yrs older. It's all good!

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  35. I've cut quite a wide swath on the age front, too--dated someone 18 years older, another 11 years younger, and married someone 12 years older. Keep 'em guessing, I say!

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  36. Ahahaha! You always crack me up! :-)

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  37. I'd like to hang out with you. And Boyfriend.

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  38. Ahhhhh what a disaster!! I like the Benjamin Button thing if it ever comes up in real life though! xxx

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  39. This was just awesome. I especially loved the part when we see what you and Boyfriend were really thinking. Hilarious!

    WTF with that email? Who does that? I'm 3 1/2 years OLDER than my husband and if anyone doesn't like it, he or she can suck it.

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  40. You handled that well in person but I can't she followed it up with an email. She should mind her own freaking business. Love the captions about the only way to get a raise. Always guaranteed a laugh over here!

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  41. Your 4th reactions was gold. Hilarious!! Thanks for the laughs Gia!!

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  42. I can't believe she actually sent an e-mail about that!

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  43. My husband and I don't go out either because we also hate people. And we don't want people to see us, even though they all know we're married.

    Loved the Ben Button line!

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  44. I think what irks me the most is this is an ex-co-worker. Next time, scratch your head the entire time you're standing there, then when you finally break free of the awkwardness, give her a hug and whisper in her ear, "I have lice" while stroking her hair.

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  45. It never fails to shock me how people feel free to voice their unsolicited opinions on private business such as whose genitals are dancing with whose. As long as you're over the age of consent and Boyfriend doesn't happen to also be her husband, it's really none of her business. I can't believe she would actually send him an e-mail about it!

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