Me: Uhhh, hi Allie.
Allie: I’m mad.
Allie: You’re going to the beach today.
Allie: I WANNA COOOOOME!
Me: Allie, you can’t. I’m going with my mom for her birthday.
Allie: THIS ISN’T FAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIR.
Me: C’mon! You get to see me every day. I’m trying to spend spend some quality time with my mom. Wouldn’t you do the same for your mom?
Allie: My mom is DEAD Gia.
Me: I’m sorry..
Allie: THANKS FOR REMINDING ME, GIA.
Me: I didn’t mean to-
Allie: She ate some guys arm in Florida so they killed her. It’s not like he died! She didn’t even eat his dominant arm! Just the left one!
Allie: It was totally blown out of proportion
Me: I understand.
Allie: Then it was like the scene in Bambi where Bambi’s mother is killed-
Me: I doubt a baby alligator is as cute as Bambi.
Me: Okay okay, I’m sure it was just like in Bambi.
Allie: THANK YOU.
Me: You’re still not coming.
You guys have any good weekend plans?