Wednesday, June 13, 2012

And Then My Mom Stole My iPhone. But Not Really.


So, remember how a few weeks ago my mom started texting?

Well, she did so because her crappy piece of shit cell phone broke, so she got a new one with a full keyboard. Not a smartphone, mind you. Just a crappy piece of shit cellphone with a full keyboard.

I didn’t think much of this, until last month. It was time for me to upgrade my crappy blackberry and I’ve been drooling over the iphones ever since they came out. It’s $200 bucks with an upgrade, which is a lot, but I’ve wanted one for so so long.


But then, my sister had some news to break to me.

Sis: Heyyy…about that upgrade….
Me: What about it?
Sis: Well…you know how mom got a new phone a few weeks ago?
Me: Yeah….
Sis: She accidentally kinda sorta used your upgrade.
Me: WHAT. How?
Sis: Since we’re on the family plan, all the upgrades are interchangeable.  She didn’t really know what she was doing.
Me: Well, when’s the next upgrade then?!
Sis: May….2013.
Me: NOOooooooo


Me: How much would mom’s phone have been without the upgrade?
Sis: Less than $200.
Me: And how much is the iphone without the upgrade?
Sis: $650.

Me: …can you return it?
Sis: Nope, sorry. I tried.
Me: What if I get an iphone from some sketchy site online? Can’t they just hook it up for me?
Sis: Nope.  Because [blahblahboringreasoniwastoodevastatedtolistento]
Me: So, I have to wait another year with my shitty blackberry that periodically stops working, or pay $650?!
Sis: Sorry.
Me: Sniffle.
Sis: Want a hug?
Me: No! I’m still traumatized by the pants incident.


Unnnghhhhh this sucks guys. Boyfriend suggests I switch carriers, but he and my family and pretty much the only people I talk to. And my family and I are all on the family network or whatnot, so it never costs us anything. Even if I switch carriers and get unlimited, it’s going to eat up all of their minutes.


I know this is definitely a first world problem, but it feels like everyone and their mother has switched to the iphone. I want it.  But unfortunately, I can’t get one. Instead, my mother has the ability to text me such gems as :


Siiiiigh.


36 comments:

  1. Nooooooo! That's a horror story. She totally stole it. Unwitting or not, she walked out of a store with what should have been yours. Never trust family. So sneaky. There are always refurbished ones you can get for a discount.

    ReplyDelete
  2. As an avid Iphone user, I would be texting your mother with cute little things like "You robbed me!" but thats just because I am a grudge holder.

    I wouldn't be able to wait a year as I want everything NOW, RIGHT NOW, I would get the Iphone 4 instead of the 4S. The 4 is 99 bucks but you can do the download and get the OS5 for free. (OR does that require an upgrade to be available?)

    Can you use other peoples upgrade to buy a phone?????

    ReplyDelete
  3. At least you still have a BlackBerry - even if it is shit. My phone is the equivalent of a yoghurt pot with a piece of string coming out of it.

    I think your mother owes you something besides those texts!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I really want to start saying yoghurt pot with a piece of string coming out of it now. It will apply to nothing I am actually talking about however, and I will just be trying to start conversations in which I can say it.

      Delete
  4. Ohhhh I was so hoping for a happy ending. I thought there was going to be some hero action going on! What a bummer :-(

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ouch that sucks, I've been screwed on the upgrades before

    ReplyDelete
  6. I think, Blackberry will give you a sweet deal if you trade up to one of their new phones? Plus.....less learning curve! :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. This is very crappy news, indeed. :( Sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I don't get why mothers need to text... seriously... just call... I won't answer... get confused at the voice mail and I'll try and return the call when I can.. Love Elle xo

    ReplyDelete
  9. Manfriend gave me an iphone for my birthday last year. I have the Iphone4. He got the Iphone 4S this year so he is now getting revenge for all last year when I was taunting him with my flashy iphone. Stop talking to Siri, dammit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. sweet sweet siri. . . I hear her siren's song. . . Next year we'll be together Siri. . . next year.

      Delete
  10. this is the type of thing that would annoy me. I don't care if it means I'm a spolied American. I'd be annoyed as hell. Who is your carrier? If it's VZW they should be able to do something for you. I used to work for them, I know things. If it's not- well shit, I'm no help.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I didn't read comments so I'm not sure if someone already said this: most plans have mobile to mobile minutes so switching would NOT eat up your family's minutes.

    I love my iPhone very much and don't know what I'd do without it. If I would've heard myself uttering that last sentence a few years back I'd have had to kick my own ass. But I love the iPhone unapologetically now. It's kind of the most awesome thing ever of all time.

    ReplyDelete
  12. may 2013 is technically less than a year from now and maybe by that time, iphone 5 is out. you'd have more choices then on the bright side.
    at least you have a blackberry now.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I totally think Mom knew exactly what she was doing... just sayin'

    ReplyDelete
  14. After reading this, I may have to reconsider the whole concept of teaching my mother to text.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I would be so annoyed if I were you. I just found out that my network have changed their early upgrade policy, so instead of getting an iphone (which I've wanted since my mum got one) in early July, I now have to wait until the end of August with my crappy phone that hasn't worked properly since I first got it two years ago. I know it's only a month, but it's going to be a loooong month!

    ReplyDelete
  16. So glad my mom has not entered the digital age and probably never will!! I want an iphone, too!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Not true my bloggy friend. If you go Sprint, which I have, you can be on there unlimited everything plan for about $90/month (after taxes) When you call mobile to mobile it doesn't matter who the carrier is. Cell to cell is always included.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Surely one of your more tech advanced readers has an old iPhone rattling among the condoms and Xanax in the magic night stand drawer and can gift it to you. Isn't that how the Internet works?

    ReplyDelete
  19. That sucks. I, and I alone handle the cell phone management in my house to avoid that very problem.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Owww... That is going to suck. That's the sort of thing my Brother does in the family though, not my Mom.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Most places give you 14 days to return the damn phone. So you return it, and then YOU upgrade, and THEN she upgrades.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. heh. . . i'm replying to myself because I'm a dumbass.

      But Jim, read the post, it says "A few weeks ago". That's more than 14 days, jackass.

      Delete
    2. Oh. . . yeah, sorry about that.

      Delete
  22. Wow, that sucks. iPhones are $650 without a contract? Sheesh.

    But good call on not just buying one online. You'd probably get the Chinese knockoff, which my friend once did, and I can assure you that while it looks exactly like a brand new iPhone, it performs exactly like a 5 year old Nokia.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Oh my gosh.

    Stab to the heart.

    Tell me she at least feels bad???

    ReplyDelete
  24. I have the solution to your problem... happened to us. Will cost you and extra $100 bucks, but you can maybe guilt mom into paying that?
    Switch to another carrier. You have 15 days to return Iphone. Switch back on day 14. You get new phone at upgrade price. It cost us the $100 in start up costs, but still cheaper than buying without discount.
    We love our iPhones!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Poor Gia! What a crock that they wouldn't let you/her return it. I agree, maybe a new carrier is in order and Sprint does have a cool everything plan as another poster said. Youngest Daughter used to work for one of their techy service contractors and that's the plan she still has. I'm on SIL's family plan and FINALLY got an upgrade a couple of years ago. It's not a smart phone but I did manage to get a QWERTY keyboard so this mama/grandma can text up a storm! Plus since I don't have data I don't pay for data - WIN! :D

    ReplyDelete
  26. Oh no! So there are no more upgrades on your family plan, like, at all?

    I'd call Verizon and ask if they can do anything. If you don't get the answer you want then call back and try someone else. I got them to give me an upgrade to the iphone several months before mine would be available, it took me four tries to get someone willing to do it. It's worth a shot.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I realize it wouldn't have Siri but you might buy the previous generation of iPhone.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Oh that SUUUCKS. On the upside, in 2013 about a week from the day you WOULD get your new iPhone, Apple will announce a new version that makes frappaccinos for you will be released in just a few months, so you can feel frozen and shitty then too.

    ReplyDelete
  29. First world problems still suck. I would be devastated too!

    ReplyDelete