So, remember how a few weeks ago my mom started texting?
Well, she did so because her crappy piece of shit cell phone broke, so she got a new one with a full keyboard. Not a smartphone, mind you. Just a crappy piece of shit cellphone with a full keyboard.
I didn’t think much of this, until last month. It was time for me to upgrade my crappy blackberry and I’ve been drooling over the iphones ever since they came out. It’s $200 bucks with an upgrade, which is a lot, but I’ve wanted one for so so long.
But then, my sister had some news to break to me.
Sis: Heyyy…about that upgrade….
Me: What about it?
Sis: Well…you know how mom got a new phone a few weeks ago?
Sis: She accidentally kinda sorta used your upgrade.
Me: WHAT. How?
Sis: Since we’re on the family plan, all the upgrades are interchangeable. She didn’t really know what she was doing.
Me: Well, when’s the next upgrade then?!
Me: How much would mom’s phone have been without the upgrade?
Sis: Less than $200.
Me: And how much is the iphone without the upgrade?
Me: …can you return it?
Sis: Nope, sorry. I tried.
Me: What if I get an iphone from some sketchy site online? Can’t they just hook it up for me?
Sis: Nope. Because [blahblahboringreasoniwastoodevastatedtolistento]
Me: So, I have to wait another year with my shitty blackberry that periodically stops working, or pay $650?!
Sis: Want a hug?
Me: No! I’m still traumatized by the pants incident.
Unnnghhhhh this sucks guys. Boyfriend suggests I switch carriers, but he and my family and pretty much the only people I talk to. And my family and I are all on the family network or whatnot, so it never costs us anything. Even if I switch carriers and get unlimited, it’s going to eat up all of their minutes.
I know this is definitely a first world problem, but it feels like everyone and their mother has switched to the iphone. I want it. But unfortunately, I can’t get one. Instead, my mother has the ability to text me such gems as :