Monday, April 23, 2012

Sometimes, I Get the Feeling Boyfriend Doesn’t Want Me to Go to the Hardware Store with Him aka the “Helping” Post.

[Linking up with yeahwrite!]

Boyfriend and I went to seaside town this weekend. He had to do lots of little jobs, including running to the hardware store and getting supplies.

Because I’m trying to be the WORLD’S BEST GIRLFRIEND, I offered to go with him.

"Offered." Or something.
Me: YAY! I’ll come and help.
Boyfriend: That’s okay.
Me: It’ll be fun!
Boyfriend: You can stay home and blog.
Me: I can blog later. YAY hardware store!
Boyfriend: Why don’t I drop you off at the beach? You could blog there. A beach blog!
Me: No.
Boyfriend: “Boyfriend dropped me off at the beach. He was acting kind of weird. It felt like he shoved me out of the car, but his hand probably just slipped. He didn’t stop the car, but it was going pretty slow.”
Me: Stop it.


Boyfriend: “Day 2. Boyfriend said he would be back soon… I bet he just took a long time in the hardware store. You know how Boyfriend gets confused in hardware stores.”
Me: YOU ARE NOT ABANDONING ME ON THE BEACH!!
Boyfriend: Fiiiiine.



So anyway, I totally went with him to the store and was super duper helpful. I was only mildly suspicious that Boyfriend was trying to meet one of his sister wives there.

WRONG AGAIN, Boyfriend.
And then, because I’m being the WORLD’S BEST GIRLFRIEND and the WORLD’S BEST GIRLFRIEND is totally helpful, I put together a grill! That’s right. Me. Versus Grill. Guys, I don’t even USE grills. But I did it. (with minimal help from Boyfriend)



Look, I really did it:

Also since I spent more time grill assembling than blogging you don't get a new post tomorrow.  Sorry! Back on Tuesday!

And I only grabbed his butt a little.


Honestly, can you  blame me? I’m only human.

Here if you're not familiar with robot girlfriend.

72 comments:

  1. Look at you getting all handy...in more ways than one. Well done. After you created the grill, did he begrudgingly admit it was a good idea to take you rather than shove you out the door of a moving vehicle at the beach?

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  2. Heyyyy, my husband went to Lowes yesterday and made it sound all like he didn't want to "trouble me" with packing the baby in the car, and then he left me at home - with the baby - and I'm starting to think maybe he was using the baby as an excuse to avoid my helpfulness!

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  3. You should never come between a man and his primeval urges in the hardware store. He probably just didn't want to be caught sniffing power tools or somesuch.

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  4. hahaha! My wife just sends me unless paint or decorating are involved.

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  5. Wow, you nailed it with that grill. I have to drag my wife along with me, and currently, we only have the Manly Grill 1000. It's about half the size and most of the time it doesn't light on its own so I have to use a long match, which is probably a very dangerous fire hazard... but it's a risk I'm willing to take for grilled meat.

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  6. Nice job on the grill Gia! And the handiness with Boyfriend. :D

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  7. I'd say it was a weekend well-spent! I don't know why he would have refused to have accepted your help in the first place. :P

    -Barb the French Bean

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  8. i dont mind the hardware store so long i stay in the sections that interest me. my husband can spend hours in one of those stores. grrr.

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  9. Putting a grill together is pretty impressive. I just watched and laughed while it took my wife hours to put ours together.

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  10. You're very good with your hands. Whether it comes to grill assembly or butt grabbing. Good work.

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  11. I don't understand...I can't imagine a place where your personality and skill set could possibly be of more use than at the hardware store.

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  12. HAAAHahaha...loved the first picture...and the last one...and all the ones in the middle. Go on with your bad self, putting a grill together. I used ours for the first time the other month. We've only had it for 10 years.

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  13. Nice job with the grill! In my opinion you more than earned your reward!

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  14. Good work you! I refuse to put together anything like that. My IKEA entertainment center was forged bravely by men that I smiled at and said, "Me girl. Me no can do anything." They knew perfectly well that's not like me at all. I just have no patience for assembling things.

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  15. Great job with the butt gra-

    I mean the gril. Great job!!! :p

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  16. Go Gia! Now you just have to learn how to use the grill and it will all be poifect!

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  17. Great job with the grill! You rock! I love this story:)

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  18. "Shh...this is my reward" with the evil look was priceless.

    I, too, have put together a grill and I'm happy to say that my brother's eyebrows grew back within a few months after he used it.

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  19. Wow, I am surprise Boyfriend doesn't take you everywhere as you are so very handy. Most guys can't put the Manly Grill 3000 together. He owes you more than the butt grab.

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  20. You are hilarious. And, I love you for that. Is that too forward?!

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  21. I'd rather take a butt-pinching from the gf than an 'atta boy' from a bro. Only girl-hands on my rump, please!

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  22. I love the hardware store! My hubby not so much - I am either coming up with projects to do or reading the back of things loudly to him or anyone else that will listen.

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  23. I am way more handy than my bf. He doesn't think so, but whatever. That's a damn fine job you did putting that bad boy together!

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  24. That wasn't Hendrickson's Home Plus he took you too, was it? Those sneaky sister wives!

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  25. You're safe at Lowe's; Mormon women go batshit crazy over Home Depot though so you'd best keep his fine ass away from those chicas at the 'Ho Depot.

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  26. We men are at one with our handyman natures whilst blissfully adrift amongst parquet flooring, PVC accessories, and assorted metal knick-knacks and gizfotchies. Girlfriends/wives tend to disrupt the force. However, NICELY DONE on the grill.
    Now, get out there and cook up a pork loin!
    Just kidding...really...don't be mad.
    But, would it kill you? ;-)

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  27. I love that you put it together! Also, I'm picturing a Jolene rather than a Loretta for the sister wife - it makes a better song..
    I will be getting a new grill soon, can you come over and help?

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  28. LMAO!!! Aww, the poor guy just wanted to go man's land. You shoulda rocked the beach ;) Oh, you're better than I am!!

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  29. You guys are the best! Love your determination to accompany Boyfriend to the hardware store. The way you attach yourself to him is so nicely done. And you know, I think he makes the whole thing dramatic just so that he can see you cling to him more. Very cute of both of you. He's obviously a sucker for attention... lol

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  30. way to go on the grill! I always like to go to the hardware store. i'm rarely asked. hehe.

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  31. Good for you with the grill!! Those things are a pain. Also, I don't know why, but that you named the sister wife Loretta made me howl with laughter. Sorry to all the Lorettas out theree. It's just a good name for a sister wife.

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  32. Gah. I HATE the hardware store. Loathe it. It smells funny there.

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  33. impressive grill building skillz!!

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  34. I am very impressed that you put together a grill. You totally deserved to goose Boyfriend. BTW, what WAS with all the Hardward Store going? Erin

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  35. OmG you continue to make me happy with your posts and your life with boyfriend. Hilarious and I'm very impressed with that grill, sister! Maybe there will be some grilling with boyfriend next?

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  36. You totally earned that butt grab! Great job with the grill!

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  37. You did not put together a grill!!! Way to jump the queue on the wives roster!

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  38. Impressed with the grill and of course the butt grab! Who says the hardware store is just for men? I love all the shiny stuff there :)

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  39. I'm very impressed. The last time I tried to put together a grill it almost caused my hubby and I to divorce!

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  40. Assembling grills always gets me in the mood for some fresh ass-grabbing too! Good for you super duper helpful girlfriend!!

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  41. Impressive! And a grab is entitled after all that hard work. :)

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  42. The butt-grabbing was the best part, no doubt.

    And dang, I'm impressed with your grill-assembly skills!

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  43. If you can put together a man-grill, then your a better woman than me. I would have opted for the beach!

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  44. this is awesome in all sorts of ways, including illustrated butt-grabs!

    hardware stores give me a boredom headache, so there is no way i would be a good girlfriend and go, or even a good sister-wife and meet-up at one.

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  45. Where did Loretta get that dress? I need something that will cover all of my limbs and give me a homely look.

    Excellent, as always.

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  46. Good job on the grill! and for the record, I've never touched our so I think you're right!

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  47. Haha! I'd rather poke my eyes out than accompny her to the hardware store. But good for you!

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  48. You are freaking hilarious. I love the butt grab, too. Makes everything just a little bit more wonderful!

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  49. I just need to stop a minute and say I think it's hilarious that the sister wife's name is Loretta.

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  50. Love this and love you. But I'm gonna have to overlook the fact that you shopped at Lowe's instead of Home Depot. (My hubby works for HD.)

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  51. Sometimes Mrs Mynd takes me to the hardware store. She likes paint swatches. I think she might be the only wife to suggest that her husband needs more power tools. She is great. Sometimes there is even risqué butt grabbing.

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  52. You crack me up. Go you on putting the grill together by yourself! I did that last summer with my 5 and 3 year old (at the time). By the end we all needed a drink. :P

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  53. I think you should be famous.
    I think you need your own comic-book style TV show or something.
    Your stuff is hilarious. I always enjoy reading it. This was fab!!!!

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  54. i had one of my first phone conversations with my husband while buying plumbign supplies at a home depot. it might have swayed his opinion about me. if only he knew then i didn't have the first clue what i was doing...

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  55. I would have have preferred being dropped off at the beach. How lovely to spend time with nature, and then my boyfriend. I like to miss my lovers.

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  56. Never in a million years could I have assembled that grill. #goyou!

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  57. Awesome job with that grill girl! I was surprised to see photos of a real grill when I scrolled down!

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  58. We bought a new grill last year. After I watched Husband try to assemble it for an hour I retreated to the closet with a bottle of wine in case he asked for help. Not interested, call me when it's done. I'm a good wife like that. Good for you!

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  59. LOL I hate going to Lowes, home depot with my husband. So I started grabbing his butt when we go, I no longer am invited! =)

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  60. You go girl. I hate going to Lowes by myself. I find myself buying thirty furnace filters and enough tub caulk for the neighborhood. I won't even talk about tools.

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  61. Bahaha! I love a good butt grab reward.

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  62. If my spouse doesn't make an appearance at our local Home Depot at least once each week, they call, looking for him.

    There is always some crucial nut, bolt or tool that he needs and...it takes the dayum man 3 hours of wandering through the aisles to find it. I mean, really.

    I hesitate to mention that a n y t h i n g around our home needs fixin' because it will require one more HD pilgrimage.

    Unless, of course, I want to get rid of him for a while.

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  63. I'd like to order a Ribeye, Medium Rare please.

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  64. I think you are so completely cool--I'm nominating you for world domination of the comic strip variety. Plus you can put together a grill. Your boyfriend should be honored that you grab his lowly ass.

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  65. Gia, I love the graphic! It's so damn cute. And it's great to be independent, and being able to handle some man-stuffs ;)

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  66. The butt grope. You had me at butt grope.

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  67. My husband is a total opposite, he drags me into every man store he can find because he "wants me with him and value's my opinion"... Hate man stores...

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  68. Wow! I mean that in terms of putting together the grill, not the butt grab!

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  69. Just wanted you to know that last night while putting Sophia to bed, (well talking with her before she goes to sleep, she is 13 for heaven's sake) she asked where I came in on the grid at yeah write. I told her sixth...she then asked who was top five...when I said, "mayor gia"...she immediately grinned and said, "that really funny one with the drawings?" We love us some mayor gia!

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