Monday, April 30, 2012

And Then We Watched Game of Thrones and Were Horrified.

[Linking up with yeahwrite!]

Have you guys noticed that there are absolutely no good movies out right now? Last Friday, Boyfriend and I had our usual date night. After dinner, we usually like to stay in and watch a movie or tv show in bed. But there is NOTHING good out right now. Seriously.


We got halfway through Hugo last weekend, and had to turn it off. (I am willing to admit that it might actually be a good movie and not just Martin Scorsese doing whatever the fuck he wants, but it’s certainly not a date night movie.)

Then this happened:



You remember the Red State incident? Yeahhhhh.

Anyhoo, now I'm going to spoil the crap out of the first episode of Game of Thrones. Consider yourself warned. 

One min 40 seconds. Not okay.



Yeah, Boyfriend likes puppies. 






Nobody's happy when Boyfriend's penis is sad. :( Seriously, we had to watch "Web Therapy" just to get it out of our minds. And that show SUUUUUUUUCKS.
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76 comments:

  1. hahaha. that's pretty much what game of thrones is all about.
    i was skeptical at first but ended up liking it.

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  2. A lot of stuff happens in the first episode, most of it is strange, but that's how they get your attention. I'm reading the books and am on the second one, they are amazing! Stick with it.

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  3. Now I am definitely going to watch it.

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  4. I'll tell you a secret. Hollywood has forgotten how to make movies. My rule is, if it's a Hollywood movie it's SHITE!!! I admit, every once in a long while, there is an exception. Right now they are in a comic book phase, and have proved they can barely cope with the intellectual content of a comic book. Unfortunately, you can't even mine the past great Hollywood movies by renting DVD's any more. Hollywood used to make great movies. You want a great date movie? Get a Bollywood film. Lots of singing and dancing by gorgeous people, and a happy ending guaranteed.

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    1. That's why I like giving the indie movies a chance.

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  5. Hahahahaha! Oh sad penis. That's hilarious. Do you guys ever watch something together that you enjoy? If you say Zookeeper or anything with Adam Sandler and I will burn down the internet.
    I love that you had to add a caption that Boyfriend likes puppies. That made me chuckle.

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    1. Nooooo!!! Don't burn down the internet! All my friends live here!

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    2. Am I your friiieend...? ;)

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  6. Funny that you write this post now because my girlfriend bought me the first season as a gift for our anniversary. We watched 8 our of the 10 episodes this weekend.

    I suggest you keep watching it. The sex and the gore get a lot worse, but it's too intense to give up, what with "winter coming" and all.

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  7. Wow, sounds horrific! Not one quality about it - except for the queen's hot brother and the cute puppies. I like you guys to be always having sexy time - not sad penis time lol... hope the next thing you watch has a better effect!

    (I'm off to the beach for ten days - will check in when I get back.)

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  8. I had been thinking about checking "Game of Thrones" out, but now I'm not so sure. I guess you don't have much of a future in HBO's marketing department.

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  9. Sounds like a good show to me! Keep in mind it's set centuries ago. That shit was normal then.

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  10. If you want to Netflix something awesome and addictive with lots of sex and less gross stuff than you would expect, seriously, Dexter is the shit. You definitely need to start with the first season though. It is the best show ever ever.

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    1. Yes yes yes! Dexter rocks! Can't wait for the new season to start!

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  11. hahahahaha and here I am dying to try it - there must be some good in it with all the buzz i hear. dying laughing at your illustrations though

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  12. oh dear - game of thrones is one of our favs!! and i loved hugo... loved it...

    sigh...

    i hope we can still be friends. ;)

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  13. I have seen half an episode of Game of Thrones...I was in the kitchen and thought hubs was watching porn from the sounds coming out of the TV. Then I poked my head around the corner and was *certain* he was watching porn. Then he told me what it was.

    I guess you could always fast forward through the beheadings to get to the sex.

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  14. You're scaring me here, because like you I keep hearing awesome things about it, and want to see it, but have a feeling it's just going to end up like this. Nothing's sexy about incest sex. Nothing. My penis is sad just thinking about it.

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  15. This made me laugh hysterically. I love this show, but the first thing I thought was, "Where'd they find all those actresses who still have their real boobies?" There are lots of boobies going around on that show. Luckily, I haven't seen any get cut off yet.

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  16. I was VERY skeptical about the show when I saw the first episode. I bought the BluRay Set for my boyfriends birthday, and I'm totally hooked now! The rule in our house on Sunday at 8pm is: don't call, don't talk, don't move, just Watch Game of Thrones! It's really really good when you get past the incest! Keep with it!

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  17. Incest is enough to make anyone's penis (or vagina) feel sad!

    But other than that, I think it's an awesome show! So awesome that I am doing my own series on my blog. With that being said, mind if I borrow one of your characters?

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  18. OMG my love for Game of Thones knows no bounds. I love the blood, gore, sex, incest, back stabbing, whoring, murdering, plotting, and revenge. It's all just so damn good.

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  19. HAHA! Love "sad penis"! I can't WAIT to use that on my husband! I can just imagine how it's going to go down:
    Doc H: (says something irritating)
    Me: REALLY?! Seriously?!
    Doc H: What?
    Me: Don't play that game with me!
    Doc H: What are you talking about?
    Me: It's "sad penis" time for you!
    Doc H: Excuse me?!
    Me: One month!
    Doc H: HUH?
    Me: TWO months!
    Doc H: What are you freakin' talking about?!
    Me: THAT'S IT!!! You're banished to 6 MONTHS SAD PENIS time!!!
    Doc H: sigh.

    HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHA!!!

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  20. incestaphobia is no laughing matter.

    hahahahhaha

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  21. Oh my goodness.. I love Game of Thrones! And the books are top notch!

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  22. I think I may have barfed in my mouth a little...that sounds quite messed up!

    Sorry about the sad penis. :(

    -Barb the French Bean

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  23. Ew. I am glad I have you to warn me about bad movies. :)

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  24. hahahaha - Well, I guess you just answered the question of whether or not we'll watch that show. Thanks!

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  25. Oh, Gia! I have missed you while I was sick and offline. You just made me laugh so hard! I needed that! My favorite drawing was when the smile came across Boyfriend's face with "Boobs are out all over". So funny!

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  26. I wanted to watch this so badly. But, with you lovely illustrations, it's like I've already seen it! What will I do with my extra hour? Hmmmm...

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  27. These were basically my same thoughts while watching the first episode, so I just pictured myself in bed with you guys! I fit right in! And I wouldn't make anyone's parts sad!

    Kay. I'm leaving now.

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  28. I haven't seen the show...but the books - while awesome - are pretty violent. There seems to be a rape every 3 pages. If I had a penis, it would be sad too.

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  29. Shows that make penises sad should be axed!!!

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  30. Yeah. That's Game of Thrones! And I love it!

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  31. Game of Thrones makes Nathan Fillion's penis happy. That is enough to bring joy to my blackened heart.

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  32. I love Game of Thrones. And I love it's 1 minute 40 start time! It's one of my favourite programmes at the minute :)

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  33. Um, this sounds exactly like the time Husband and I watched Spartacus (TV show, not movie) together. And I am getting damn sick of there being nothing good to rent!

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  34. I heard great things about Games of Thrones, but after hearing your recap maybe I won't check it out. LOL

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  35. Heh. I hope Boyfriend's penis cheers up soon.

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  36. I cannot decide if your review is a turn off or if it makes me want to actually watch the show. I wasn't interested at all until I read this.

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    1. Ha! It's not BAD. The acting/script/filming and stuff is all very good. It's just...disturbing. Consider yourself warned.

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  37. The Avengers comes out next week.

    Also, you could watch Breaking Bad, Arrested Development, Community. Unless you have already. I love them all.

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  38. Ugh! I'm so glad I read this. For a minute, I was almost willing to watch Game of Thrones!

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  39. Aw but it really is a great show!

    You did recap it pretty well, however.

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  40. I don't know why, I can read the books but not watch the show... seeing the little boy being flung out the window really was too much. But the books ARE pretty good. AND apparently, once you get past the first few episodes, it gets sorta less gruesome.

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  41. OMG, I think I just choked. "My penis is sad." Bahahaha! Poor penis. No really, it's sad, not funny. But seriously, it's funny.

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  42. But it has a midget!!! Gotta love a show that has a midget.

    And I just started watching and reading the first season too. Personally I love it! But I like all that graphic violence and stuff. There's never enought for me. Also I came to peace with the fact that I am disturbed years ago.

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  43. Ha! Nothing like a little sibling on sibling romp to completely spoil the mood. "My penis is sad" made me laugh, but so did "ooh, puppies!" Loved it, as usual. Erin

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  44. Thanks for the warning! I will be adding that movie to my "never watch this" movie list!

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  45. So funny! I will remember your warning and won't add this show to my to be watched folder.

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  46. My husband just DVRed the entire first season of Game of Thrones when there was an all-day marathon one weekend when we had free HBO. He hasn't watched it yet but I was intrigued because I'd also heard there was lots of sex. Then again, the one time I turned it on (it was the very end before I movie I wanted to watch came on), a guy and a girl were doing it doggie-style in a tower (niiice!) and then a little boy walked in on them and the man pushed him out of the tower and he fell to his death and I was horrified. The end.

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  47. Sad penises are WRONG.

    ~The G is Silent

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  48. Sex is not sex is not sex. Puppies are cute, but I'd always be wondering....is someone going to have sex with them and then behead them? Or behead them and then have sex with them?

    Oh dear.

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  49. I love you...you make me giggle

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  51. Good one. I got enough from the trailers to know it was not for me. And you confirmed it. In your inimitable funny way!

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  52. Hahaha! Well NOW you've gone and made me curious about this show. Ha! You're so creative. Love the drawings each week. ...and so you know, I heard the new Mission Impossible is awesome. ;)

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  53. Anything that makes a penis sad is a no go! End of discussion! I will move heaven and earth to hide this from Irishman if that is the case.

    Thank you for the warning.

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  54. I'll grant you that Game of Thrones does not make for good foreplay. However it is AWESOME and you and your sad penis need to make peace with that. HBO has mastered the technique of awesome writing + porn that makes you not want to have sex. Which doesn't make for good date night viewing. But is still awesome :)

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  55. Should have gone with Horrible Bosses. At least they didn't sleep with their siblings. (Actually pretty funny flick)

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    1. And Jennifer Aniston does some things in there that absolutely will counteract a sad penis.

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  56. Loved your post and dialogue. So funny!

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  57. I readn and loved the books, not watching it on TV but LOVED your rendition. ROFLOL!!!

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  58. The hubby and I have also noticed a lack of good movies out right now. We've been watching The Walking Dead again...not very romantic though. :)

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  59. But it had puppies? Thanks for spoiling what was sure to be the worst night of my life...no really, thanks!

    WG
    http://itsmynd.com

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  60. Wasn't going to watch it anyway but thanks for sealing the deal just in case. Great and funny post as always!

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  61. I was thinking about watching it just because I'm seeing so many tweets about it. Thanks for summing it up for me and I'm gonna have to pass on that one. Incest is not best, thankyouverymuch.

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  62. Hadn't heard of it until now. I live under a rock. But it would seem my rock is a good place to be these days : )
    Dana

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  63. I tried reading the book but couldn't read pass chapter 2. I gave up :) guess that tells why...

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  64. Hahaha!! Best review of Game of Thrones ever.

    I'm a fan of the books. Have to say - the TV show IS nicely done. Blame the author for the themes, hehe.

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  65. Ok, so I tried to read the first book and it was agonizingly boring, so I quit. Nice to know I can just skip the shows too. I think you need to do more reviews.

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  66. Ha! Now I know what NOT to watch!

    And it reminds me why I read erotica... for those rare but special moments with my hubby-of-ten-years!

    Love, love your blog!

    Thanks for commenting on mine!

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  67. I think I just peed a little. Thanks for the laughs!!

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  68. well clearly you need the interwebs to getcherself a little 50 shades of somepin' somepin. I predict the return of the ardent manroot. Yeah. Game of THrones. Sucks to be a woman on that show. Kinda sucks to be a man, too. peter dinklage comes out okay, more or less, and his diabolicalism (is that a word) makes Iago look like something out of See Spot Run. Books are LONG LONG LONG and basically about the different qualities of mud and life-suckiness. But kind of good, too. In a hey-my-life-isn't-so-bad kind of way.

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  69. You would have been much better off with Horrible Bosses. Ellen

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  70. Lots of sex. Yup. Lots of blood and gruesomeness and lots of medieval sex. With little people. Or person.
    I pretty much have to watch my HBO and Showtime shows on my iPad with headphones. My "lurid, smutty, expletive riddled" shows as my Hubby likes to tease. I think it's a contest for how many F bombs they can pack into 20 minutes. And how many dick jokes. I'm just a simple housewife. Bring me my Weeds! ;)

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