Wednesday, March 28, 2012

That Wine Thing...


Imaginary reader: So, how’s that one glass of wine a night thing going for you?
Great! Thanks for asking!

Imaginary Reader: Really?
Yep. Moderate drinking, here I come!

Imaginary reader: Really really?!?
Yes. Sheesh!

Imaginary reader: You’re lying. I have evidence.
Um, what are you talking about?!?

Imaginary reader: How do you explain THIS PICTURE:

The bad thing is,  this really isn't that much of an exaggeration.

Fuck.

Imaginary reader: Yeah.
I like wine, okay? Boyfriend and I went down to seaside town and I drank and ton and ate even more.

Imaginary reader: Don’t blame Boyfriend for your lack of control.
He made bread with cheese on it. And bought me wine.

Imaginary reader: Ooo, that sounds good.
I know right??

Imaginary reader: Wait! Not the point! You’re terrible at cutting back on wine!
I know. I’ll do better next week.

Imaginary reader: Really?
Dunno. Maybe.

29 comments:

  1. The sea, bread, and cheese? How dare anyone question the need for wine!

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  2. That picture is obviously fake. Wine doesn't come in BOTTLES!

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  3. Wine is good.
    Thanks for visiting my blog.
    Following you.

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  4. I think it's safe to say that this is obviously Boyfriend's fault.

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  5. i think i need a drink...maybe not just A drink.
    :p

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  6. Bread, cheese and wine? Well lah-dee-dah miss swanky! Last night I indulged in home-brewed beer and lard, straight from the packet.

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  7. How are you supposed to not drink wine when bread and cheese are in front of you?! I think you were set up!!

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  8. Well, if somebody BUYS you wine, it would be rude not to drink it. Very, very rude.

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  9. mmhh cheese bread!! You'll do better next time if you really want too.

    I try to cut down on cookies and cakes...very hard if your house mate keeps buying god damn tasty swiss roles!

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  10. You can't digest cheese without wine. It's a scientific fact.

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  11. Agreed. You were set up by Boyfriend...maybe he is trying to make you forget that post he promised you. However, there sounds like very little that would be better than wine, cheese and a little getaway. Nicely done, Boyfriend.

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  12. You are legally obligated to drink wine when served bread with cheese. That's not your fault.

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  13. As long as you control yourself in the mornings, at work, and in the afternoon I say you're fine! :)

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  14. Not drinking is so much harder than drinking. Especially when someone buys you wine and cheese. Boyfriend was asking for a slip, really!

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  15. Way to go Boyfriend. Totally his fault for baiting you knowing you'd bite. Wine cheese and bread are 3 of my favorite things. I feel your pain.

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  16. It's like Boyfriend set you up to fail.

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  17. It's only a problem when you admit it's a problem. Until then, denial works. :)

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  18. Wait a second, don't put us in the role of the judgmental, vice-shaming, authoritarian! That's a job for your imaginary animal characters. It's not like you were going to AA, you just wanted to cut back a bit. Nothing wrong with a weekend blowout.

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  19. Poor Gia. To quote: "I can resist anything except temptation"

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  20. seriously. Your imaginary reader is a total douche.

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  21. It's ok. We totally forgive you even those the imaginary reader seems to take things a little too harsh. It's a work in progress!

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  22. A loaf of bread, a jug of WINE and thou.... It's as old as the hills. 'Nuf said! Enjoy!!

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  23. Real commenter: Imaginary reader, unless you have a "My mom drank wine one day and went crazy and took out a bus full of nuns and now I can't even think about wine without getting depressed about my mom" kind of story, there is no need to be judgmental.

    lol

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  24. To The Honorable Mayor Gia:

    I found that in my town that the only way to cut back on drinking was to stop. Now I drink the occasional glass of wine on a holiday. AND EVERY DAY IS A HOLIDAY -- at least where I'm the mayor.

    Love,
    Janie Junebug

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  25. Bread, cheese and wine. Eh, I guess you can have your indulgences every once in a while. :)

    -Barb the French Bean

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  26. lol I think you should tell your imaginary reader to shut up! Can you block them from your blog?

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  27. It's totally difficult to cut back on things you love. I totally understand you!!

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  28. I know you're trying to cut back and all, but isn't there a rule that when someone else brings you wine it's customary to drink the whole bottle at once?

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